Day 8 - Veni, Vidi, Volvo'd

Somehow a 2000 mile drive in a banger seems like a walk in the park compared to transferring between Terminal 1 and Terminal 5 at Heathrow. Strangely, not a single balloon to greet our arrival back in the UK (but at least one of the guys at arrivals looked like a bit of a numpty, boom, boom).

Thanks all for reading and words of encouragement along the way. Keep an eye here as we will be adding pictures/videos and links to all our pictures in the coming days.

Any Sucata Teams reading this who have any picture of the Mighty G on the road, we'd be delighted to see them, please email to me and we'll send any we have of you back...

To answer the questions you're all dying to ask:

1. It was 174 km/h...
2. No, I didn't have to pee in the car... for which we were all eternally grateful.
3. Yes, Andrew is still wearing the key round his neck.

This is Team GI from T5 saying, until such time...

Day 7: The morning after the week before

The G has gone to a better place >sniff< and the party's over. The random selection of emergency spares and consumables have been disposed of and we have a few hours to kill today. So it's a light* lunch at the beach for Team GI before an evening of cultural pursuits in Cascais and then an early flight out. [AW]

*this is only comparatively the case, with the exception of the light Jimmy Shand country dance tunes playing in the bar.

Day 6 - A Place In The Sun

The General leaves with Andrew at the wheel to his final resting place in a field above Estoril.

Day 6 - Finished!

G at Cabo di Roca, 2177 miles

Day 6 - Lisbon

Over there, behid the bridge railing...

Day 6 - Evora

Couldn't find any wine but we did find more building work going on, I'm sure they'll get it finished soon.

Back seat now hotter than the sun. The celestial body not the super-soaraway newspaper.

Day - 2000 miles

We have now driven 2000 miles since leaving Edinburgh.

Day 6 - Country 4

"King Juan Carlos, Salvador Dali, Pablo Picasso, Rafael Nadal, Seve Ballesteros, Fernando Alonso, Julio Iglesias, Fernando Torres, Placido Domingo, Maria Callas, Miguel Indurain, Manuel of of Fawlty Towers... We gave your country one hell of a beating!"

And now for something not entirely different...

Portugal. Here we are.

Day 6 - Bacchanalia

If you have looked at a map and are wondering why we're not taking the direct route to Lisbon, Google 'evora' and 'wine...

Day 6 - Just Passed Caceres

Get yer atlases out, just passed Caceres and lining up for a big right into Portugal. Flat, brown.

Oh, and hot. Nice if you're with a lady ain't no good in the back of a Volvo...

Day 6 - Road to Nowhere

This is the road we thought we'd be on today. Sadly, somewhat omitted to tell TomTom that it is a line of flattened mud covered in JCB's waiting for the sand people to come to dismantle them.

Strangely, no sign of double time on a Sunday.

At least I can now hear the music again in the back, the bus that was holding us up has pulled off so the gnashing of teeth has subsided.

And as I scribble, a dual carriageway appears...

Day 6 - Road to Portugal

Slightly later start today. Not related to the slightly later finish in any way, it just took a while to get G past the Balrog and out of his subterranean dungeon.

If you remember the Top Gear team getting the supercars out of the Paris hotel... has to be said, Mark did significantly better than any of Messrs Clarkson, Hammond & May, despite it being to navigate a brick round a U-bend. A cloud of clutch particulate hung in the air like cordite at Jutland.

If you liked those similes, find more at www.thebeatleman.com

Oh, come on, you all knew I would...

Day 5 - The Photographer Never Sleeps

Although he is getting a wee bit sleepy.

Big church. Salamanca. Night.

Travel photography brought to you by the Society For Word Economics.

Day 5 - Salamanca Par Nuit

Day 5 - Grab A Grandad

Leisa has a new friend. Hope he's rich!

Day 5 - Competition Time

Got this text from Orange today:

"Hello from Orange. You have now used at least 5Mb of data abroad since last Sunday."

So, here's the competition, what's my phone bill gonna be?

Stick your guess in as a comment.

Day 5 - Sun Setting on Salamanca

Sucata Superstars Set for Session in Salamanca Square.

Day 5 - Plaza Mayor - Salamanca

The meeting point is bottom right. As are Mark and Andrew, having a very welcome cold one.

Day 5 - Salamanca

Arrived in Salamanca. Once again, G was a peach all they way down.

Day 5 - Flat, Brown

That is all.

Day 5 - Salamanca Bound

Dark glasses? Gap in teeth? Morpheus, is that you?

Back at the wheel of the Blog after a stint down from San Sebastian. The back of the car is lovely, we're baking cakes.

Day 5 - Bilbao Baby!

Day 5 - Leaving Bilbao for Salamanca

Unconventional angular design upstaged by art gallery (See the picture
below.) [AW]

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Day 5 in the Big Volvo house

Don't panic. The lack of an update to the blog so far this morning is
only because the Blogmeister is behind the wheel for the run to
Bilbao. We're looking forward to causing as much chaos at the
Guggenheim as we did at the Eiffel Tower... I would give you more of a
travelogue, but the 'x' key on the phone is worn out. (Basque
reference there for all you lovers of lingerie.) [AW]

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Day 4 - Shotty! We've pulled!

Good effort guys, sorry, ladies.

Day 4 - Taking Organising Seriously

Day 4 - Portobello (by night)

San Sebastian has lit up.

Day 4 - Chris being impressed with technology

This is how easy it is!

Day 4 - San Sebastian

Portobello (nae chips)

Day 4 - Touchdown in Irun

The 3 Amigos (I can say that, now that we're in Spain) say 'Hi' to
everyone reading this blog at SAIC. The bank holiday weekend has
really started here - with queues at the Peage and disinterested
Spanish taxi drivers to match. [AW]

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Day 4 - Country 3

Viva Volvo! Spain! And we're listening to Sigur Ros. Go figure.

Day 4 - Geographically speaking

If North Berwick is the Biarritz of the North, is Biarritz the North
Berwick of the South?

The 'Colonel Gascon' (lime sorbet and white
armagnac) was lovely btw. Just desserts after such a, eh, swift run
from La Rochelle. [AW]

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Day 4 - Abandoned

The G? Never!

But we have abandoned the idea of ascending the Col as we're running a bit short of time to get to San Seb for dinner.

"But you've just had a huge..."

Tish! Pshaw! We'll manage.

G just got a little hot in a peage queue, heat starting to impact all equipment. Our new feature "Live Oxter-cam" has failed due to moisture problems.

Day 4 - Mmm... Armangac

Day 4 - More Fuel Please

The G overtaking Team Sanz Vino as they pull in for their 17th fuel stop of the day!

Day 4 - Sixteen Tons

Lunch over and car quite a bit heavier. En route to San Sebastian now but planning to take a very crazy route over the Col d'Ispeguy.

Currently chugging along behind the guzzling Jag of team Sanz Vino.

Day 4 - Pudding?

"With this white armangac you are spoiling us..."

Asleep in the back by 2pm.

Day 4 - La Gastronomie

If you want to see what a rough time we're having, check out the menu at www.latupina.com. I tell you, it's a chore...

Day 4 - La Tupina

...and Andrew's order has arrived.

Day 4 - Chi-ching

More points for the boys in the photography landmark competition. Gives you a clue where we are too.

Day 4 - Bordeaux next stop

In service stations all over the world, lawyers are struggling with their 'electronic gizmo thingies:

Day 4 - Taking the Pith (to Bordeaux)

We sent a trained and heavily insured racoon out onto the bonnet at 130km/h to get this. Enjoy it in his memory.

Day 4 - Web 20

No, I didn't miss the '.', this mobile blogging from the back of a 19 year old Volvo is now considered so advanced it is a full 18 versions ahead of the rest of the Internet.

Stick that up yer Twitter!

About to leave for Bordeaux and lunch in La Tupina. Mmmm.. Vache.

Day 4 - Political News

When asked how many Volvo 240s he currently owns, Rooney answers: "I'm not sure..."

Day 3 - (no really, the end of)

Day 3 - (End Of)

C'est tres jolie, n'est pas?

Day 3 - By The Sea

La Rochelle seems like a jolly nice place. The sun has come out but cameras are frustratingly in bags as we are about to eat

Day 3 - La Rochelle

End of day 1 proper. In La Rochelle.

Does anyone know what a 'Rochelle' is? Apparently it's feminine and there's only 1 of them.

Day 3 - Convoi Exceptionnel

Just been stopped at the side of the road...

...to let a large section of Airbus fuselage pass on the back of a truck (did I have you worried there for a second?)

Day 3 - The Sleepiness Of The Long Distance Passenger

Day 3 - Over-taking-tastic

After a detour down the Mulsanne, we're now picking off fellow Sucateers. Here we are passing the Kenton Motors team in their rather nice 'fast' black.

Day 3 - Le Sud

<TravelWriter>
170km to La Rochelle and we're starting to leave the grey/rain of the North behind. The sun is now more frequently punching through the paper bag of clouds.

The colours in the landscape are becoming gradually more brown, green giving way to brown in a way that most French drivers don't. (The ghost of Douglas Adams drifts idly by.)

The heat in the car continues to rise as we pass a sign that says "Attention au sac du balons". Wonder what that means?

In the distance, off to the right, I can just about make out a Second Unit camera crew waiting to catch Michael Palin as he passes on the train.
</TravelWriter>

Day 3 - More News

Shock news! The USA have dropped the baton in the 4x100m relay.

Olympic news brought to you by Team GI, entertaining and informing the nation since Tuesday.

Am I taking this Ben Dirs thing too far?

Day 3 - Leafy Lanes

En route from Le Mans to La Rochelle. Bit of a detour via Angers as some kind person closed the road.

Been through the French equivalents of Gorebridge, Bonnyrigg and Penicuik.

Boiler suits now causing a bit of a 'glow'. However, any attempt to remove them in-car would result in hospitalisation.

Day 3 - Le Mans

After an uneventful run in the rain down from Rouen, G has just completed some laps of the Mulsanne Straight in preparation for next years race.

Here we see Mark pulling in to make some minor downforce adjustments.

Between the wars...

After a lengthy test programme, we have reached the conclusion thst
the only music which sounds even half-decent throught the OE speakers
in the G is 1985 Billy Bragg. Not Michelle McManus. Not Darius Danesh.
Only Billy.

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Day 3 - Rolling rolling rolling

We're off and running in the first group away. So we're heading for Le
Mans with the Mazdateers, the purple mob, Captain Chaos and the only
running Austin Maxi in France.

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Day 3 - The Competition

Looks formidable...

Day 3 - The Start Line!

"That's great, it starts with an earthquake, birds and snakes and airplanes, Lenny Bruce is not afraid..."

And neither are we.

But we look daft. Which is nice.

Day 2 - Proof...

...as if it were required, of our arrival in Rouen. Very nice it is too...

Day 2 - Worp 5 Mr. Sulu

These Frenchies don't half like their tunnels.

Day 2 - Road to Rouen (© WDG)

After a most welcome café au Place Victor Hugo, we're off out of Paris and on way to Rouen.

Le bum du squeak est finis (pour le moment).

Day 2 - A (bad) Picture Paints...

Well done A & G!

Day 2 - Blitzkreig!

With A at the wheel and G ignoring his advanced years, we have been propelled to the outskirts of Paris faster than a Panzer division trying to catch the last bus.*

Take a deep breath all, we're going in.

* - blogging style © Ben Dirs

Day 2 - Aire Bois D'Arsy

"When in France I only eat Ecclefechan Tarts"

Day 2 - Pic Test

Sur l'autoroute des Anglais. 2 of us feel out of place.

Testing to see if I can get a photo on the blog via email. No idea what will happen!

Day 2 - Allons y!

On y va! Nous sommes en France!

We have the scary-meter set to 'Paris'. This could be funny!

Team "nae chance nae way too early too grumpy" depart Ballsocks Lane - early

Day 2 - Bateau (part deux)

Full cooked breakfast on a reasonably bumpy ferry Is there any end to the bravery of this intrepid trlo?

Day 2 - Sur le bateau

G is safely aboard the ferry. All very hassle free.

Top Team GI Fact : The team have sufficient cablage to charge 12 electrical items simultaneously.

Day 2 - 1066 Country

After some marvelous overnight hospitality, we are en route to the coast.

G is still in fine fettle.

Day 1 - Asda in Crawley

A is inbound from London, so M & I are getting some essentials from Asda in Crawley. If I open my eyes and look around, it could be an Asda anywhere.

The Top Gear test track looked nice. Shame they wouldn't let us in to take photos.

Day 1. From Andrew: i have in my hand a...

Passport acquired. Game on.

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From Andrew: Meanwhile... (Your City correspondent writes)

My day started on an Airlink bus to the airport. My sustenance has (up
to this point) been BA tea. But now I'm sitting in the Slug and
Lettuce next to the London Eye, enjoying some chicken salad and a pint
of Peroni which makes my predicament a little easier to bear. I should
receive a call in the next 15 minutes confirming that my passport has
been returned from the Indian Embassy. Meantime, I'm tempted to talk
to the chaps parking their big yellow DUKWs -
www.londonducktours.co.uk - outside the pub if we can borrow one to
cross the Channel in the morning.

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Day 1 - Shock News

G overtakes an M3 on M40.
(M3 retaliates soon after)